Unanswered

How long had I been compelled by darkness?

How much hate consumed my heart?

How long did I endure suffering?

How much of me did I tear apart?

How long couldn’t I stand myself?

How much abuse did I take?

How long didn’t I love myself?

How many mistakes did I make?

How did you find me?

When I try and never could.

What did you see in me?

When In me I see no good.

Why should I believe you?

How do I know it’s not lies?

What makes you so different from

Every other guy?

You keep promising your love,

Promise you never leave,

But how can I trust you when

I’ve been constantly deceived,

You say you want my heart but that’s

Something that I lack

How can I give you something,

I never quite got back?

How long must I suffer?

How much must I cry?

How long will I go on aching

Unable to live my life?

My Path

I live in a world that says that I’m free,
But I’m free to be anyone, anyone but me,
Accused of going down a path that to them seems so wrong,
Making me feel out of place like I don’t belong,
I live in a world daily experiencing hate,
Condemn for a lifetime to a discriminatory fate,
Never heard out always prejudged,
Fueling my sadness at the same time my grudge,
I live in a world but with quite no life,
Never happy, constantly ignoring my strife,
Never content, much less in peace,
And this anger inside me finds no release,
I live in a world if I could say live,
When there’s seems to be nothing to exist for
Much less to believe.

Splendor of Life

I Sit here by the window and stare out into
A splendor that many don’t perceive,
The way the trees sway back and forth
Slowly dancing to the rhythm of the wind,
Or possibly the radiant glow of that summer morning sun
That energizes everything it touches,
The stunning and harmonic sounds of the merry birds
That is always a delight to wake to,
I sit here by the window a bit different today,
For I have realize that beauty exist in everything
If I had just been more in touch with my senses,
Just in the way rain falls showering everything with life,
In the way the clouds drift insensibly towards no particular goal,
Or the flowers that lay beautifully like motionless butterflies atop trees,
And all I lament is being blinded for so long and taking for granted
The magnificence and bliss
Life itself in all its forms is able to bring.

Slave to Routine

I feel as though I drown in a sea of sorrow filled memories,

That I lack air every time I can’t decipher on why things happen the way they did,

I can’t seem to escape from the four walls that surround me and it seems futile

To make an attempt to find an escape and

Take new steps when I always end up confuse and disoriented,

I feel that my heart is scarred with pain and failure,

And can’t no longer be relieve much less put be whole again,

I stay indifferent at the warmth of the afternoon and the invasive cold of the night

Because happiness and sorrow tend to always have the same effect on me

The same consequences make the same difference,

I feel I have made a lot of mistakes and

That I will always make them but I know that despite what I feel

My heart will keep beating with the hope that someday I will find everlasting happiness.